The power of love

We want it all, everything we see, everywhere, anywhere, our desire knows no bounds. Yet that is what makes us so dangerous, that is what makes us so deadly, so noble, so dependable. We know no boundaries, we seek no finish line. Our pure goal is completion. We don't wait for it to come to us, we go out and we find it. The human heart sets no limits and the human spirit knows no perimeters. Beneath our shell of skin and bones stirs a force more powerful than we could ever imagine, more dangerous than we can fathom. It dwells in the depths, nurtured by our heart and our spirit, and stirred only through our selfless passion. 

This is the force that motivates us to work that extra job, to run that extra mile, or spend that extra hour helping someone else. In the big picture its the force that causes a man to disregard all aspects of selfish human nature and throw himself in harms way to protect another. This force isn't jealousy, it isn't anger or hatred, this force is love. A love for someone else that can only be expressed through our willingness to sacrifice a part of ourselves, our lives, in order to make them better. The most noble of examples that we find on a daily basis is in our parents. Their willingness to go the extra mile in the office and at home. However, parents like that are few and far between these days. Fathers have replaced fatherly advice and quality time with money. They have pawned off role modelling to actors and athletes, in order to pursue their own goals and dreams. 

So why have parents so eagerly spurned their parental duties? Is it easier putting in time at work, or at the gym, or at the nail salon, than to spend the time at home? Their is no better a way to each someone than through examples, but now we live in an age where parents say, "do as I say, not as I do." My time in the military has taught me that to be an effective leader you must never as someone to do something that you are not willing to do yourself. Because of that fact of leadership, much to my parents dismay, I got the latin quote, 'ductus exemplo' tattoed on my right side, meaning 'leadership by example.' My belief is that no matter what walk of life I am in, in my career, at home, leadership by example must be my motto. 

In a country controlled and guided by music and video (TV, youtube, movies, etc...) fathers have opted out of the hard talks, just as one might decide not to do the dishes one day, fathers have decided that they no longer want to mentor their kids through life. We live in a culture plagued by the adult industry, sex is casual at 15, and porn is the new sex ed for middle schoolers. Yet fathers and mothers continually shy away from the hard conversations, the awkward conversations, and the uncomfortable conversations. 

What happened to fathers being the head of the household? Not because we are men, but because every morning we wake up and claim that right. We claim that right through what we say and what we do. We claim that right because we spend more time on our knees asking for wisdom and guidance than we do on our feet. We claim that right because we are the last to go to bed and the first to get up, because every day we wage war on behalf of our families. Fathers are not the head of the household because we are better than women. Fathers are the head because they fight, they protect, they defend, and above all, they love. They love through their words, through their actions, and through their thoughts. 

Change

Its a thing of beauty the way our mind processes things. Each person sees things differently, we all have a different perspective, a different view, a unique view. Yet somehow in all of the chaotic differences we are able to find a middle ground. We're able to find a perspective that makes sense to all of us, well, most of us. We are able to compromise, sacrifice, and reason in order to come to an answer.

But what do we do when we can't find that answer? What do we do when we compromise and sacrifice so much that we no longer know where we started to begin with. How do we reason when we don't even know what perspective we had to begin with. We've all been there. We've all been so caught up in a situation that when we look back we can't trace our footsteps to the beginning. There are three things that happen at this point. We panic, and get lost even more than we were before trying to find our way back. We become angry and bitter toward the situation and blame it for our confusion, or lastly, we stop, we allow the situation to pass us by, and we start a new beginning, because we realize that even if we can trace our steps back to where we were before, nothing will be the same, because we have changed.

Change is an incredible art, its a majestic idea, it allows for a fresh start, it re-ignites passion, and re-inspires the mind, but we don't normally like change. We don't like trying something new, or trusting something we don't know. We like to say we have faith, but there is no truer test of our faith than change. And many times, our faith fails us.

Change scares us because with change comes ideas and people that we can't predict or anticipate. Change brings new things, things that require time and effort to get to know and understand, and many of us are to worn out to invest in something that scares us. Change isn't all that bad. Change means new steps, a new beginning, a fresh beginning. But, change requires faith, because change is a test from God. Change is God.  

Fathers Day

Today is a day for Dad's. Some of us grew up in a family with the "ideal" dad, some of us grew up in a family without a dad, and some of us grew up in a family where our dad was our worst enemy. But no matter what our situation is, we all have a father. I don't believe that its blood that defines who that father is. I believe its what they teach us and how they teach us that defines a dad. 

I can't wait to be a father. I can't wait until I can look into the eyes of a child knowing that everything I say and do he or she will emulate. It is a daunting task, it is a tough challenge. But the inspiration that comes with knowing you are responsible for teaching and raising a child that you made is beyond comprehension. There is a great power that comes with being a father, one that can either make or break a child. 

My father taught me how to be a man. He didn't do this through hunting or through sports. In some ways I guess you could say that his ways were slightly unconventional. My dad taught me that its okay to cry, he showed me how to have a warriors heart, but not to run over someone. I grew up seeing my dad as a military veteran and a big city paramedic/fireman, who has saved more lives then he would ever admit to. But the thing that made my dad special wasn't necessarily what he did, it wasn't the stories that he would tell. It was his ability to convey an attitude of selflessness and portray a servants heart without needing to boast on what he had done. 

Its hard to sit here and imagine or try and understand all of the sacrifices that my dad willingly made to benefit me. I know that someday as a father I will understand the frustration, heartache, joy, pride, and many many other feelings that come with being a parent. However, until then all I can do is say thank you and do everything in my power to honor my father. To dad's  across the world thank you, thank you for everything that you have done and continue to do for your kids. We may never fully know everything that you've given for us. 

And to my friends I would encourage you to read this article. Who wouldn't want to be remembered as a great dad? http://www.teamrubiconusa.org/dans-gift/