I've never been so scared. Scared of letting go, scared of moving on, scared of discovering, scared of change and of trying new things. I'm so lost that it isn't even believable. So lost that I can't even figure out where to start. I am so lost, that I'm not actually sure if I even want to be found, so broken I'm not even sure if I want to be fixed.
I'm sitting here watching as life goes flying by, and it feels like there is never enough time. Never enough time to see my family, never enough time to spend with my friends. Never enough time to spend learning, or trying new things, or cherishing old memories.
Its hard accepting the reality that I will always make mistakes. That I will always do something wrong, that no matter how hard I work, how much I pray, I will always fall short. In more ways than one its disheartening. It makes me look toward the future and ask, "what is the point?"
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